I hope you all enjoyed your weekend! January has been kicking butts where I’m from, as almost everyone I know is getting sick or getting over something. Take your vitamins and take care of yourselves.
Now on to today’s topic. The family. My spouse . This week I wanted to focus on families, and who better to start the week off with than the spouse. You can use my thoughts for your marriage, significant other, yourself looking on the outside, or just yourself if you are looking to find love. I am married and have been for awhile, but I don’t look down on those who aren’t yet..
Those of you who like me are married, know the challenges. You meet, you date, you get engaged, you wed, and then life and your relationship really begins. Every married couple can attest that once you live with your spouse life changes and so does your relationship. Every married couple with children like my husband and I, will tell you that the changes become even more prominent. So how does one manage married ? Simple LOVE.
Think of yourself as a honeybee, a honey bee works all day, but always knows to return home. Through bad weather, challenges, and different routes, the honey bee is loyal and faithful to his or her family. The honeybee always returns home. So managing as a spouse means through thick and thin, through better or the worst, you ALWAYS return home. You always find a way, and you choose to make it through or move on… which is not the goal unless you’ve exhausted everything.
My husband and I, are those honeybees. We have had obstacles in our way, as people, as parents , and as a spouse. We have had rainstorms in our parades, and we have been at rock bottom. So how are we here ? How did we do it? Love. The number one problem married couples face is comparing their marriage to others, as no two marriages are exactly the same. Not even realizing it, you can compare and contrast your marriage to others’ or just fantasize about how it should be is tras of making it that way. The number one problem married couples with children face is not spending enough couple time together. Like dates, and talking about things that aren’t child related. The number one hardship for all couples is forgiveness, how to forgive for-real, and how to accept when someone has forgiven you..
Each spouse has different needs and wants and those change weekly, monthly, yearly, with age, or with circumstance. The key is to be willing to have tough discussions, willing to continue on, and willing to sometimes put your pride aside.
Before I met my husband I was a prideful person. I hated asking for help, I didn’t like talking about my feelings, and I was ok being a loaner sometimes, as I felt being committed meant I’d have to surrender my independence. I was wrong. Before my husband met me, he was unsure if his dreams were reachable, he was prideful to in the same ways I was, and he was always careful when communicating his true feelings. Now he is working doing what he dreamed of for many years, he is ok asking for help or should I say accepting help, and we both still are learning how to do everything else. Each day is a learning curve for us, and our son has made it a priority for us to become better people apart and together.
So why did I choose the spouse as the first family member to discuss? Well, when two people fall in love, have children, the circle of life begins. The circle of life starts with a choice made by those same two people and continues on and on and always will… this is why it’s so important to appreciate our spouses, love them, honor them, respect them, laugh with them, cry with them, and talk about everything in between with them. No secrets. no matter how tough.
So today reevaluate your role with your significant other and see if you’re doing right by them… also look at your needs and wants and see if you need to communicate what you need and want more of. If you don’t have kids, don’t wait until you do…
No ones perfect but we can together strive for perfection and a honest relationship. For us parents, how we are with each other makes a difference in who our kids become and if they will allow real pure love in their life someday..
I wish for you all to hold on to true love, let go of toxic love, and make sure you are true and not toxic..
♥️ Blog shout out to my husband. We’ve made it this far, almost a decade, I think we can continue make the future gold . Also to my son who continues to help us grow as people, parents, and role models. You remind mommy and daddy everyday of our purpose in life and what it means to love unconditionally
Much love ,